Air (Conditioner) Emergency!

You know those dramatic National Geographic Air Emergency programs–a shocking and tragic story about poor design, questionable maintenance and pilot error; all of which combine into a tragedy costing hundreds of lives? Well, here we have Air Conditioning Emergency.

The story begins–a cheap outdated swamp cooler, designed by goofballs, with parts supplied by unscrupulous internet-based companies. The technical crew responsible for adequate operation of the bleed-off valve (ehrr, me) neglects routine maintenance due to an industry culture rife with brain cramps. Leading up to the final crisis, the pilot (Egor) leaves the bleedoff valve on full throttle overnight. He believes that he is cleaning the system, when instead he is flushing calcium build-up into the water lines, leading to devastating and misleading water-line clogs.

The next morning the bleedoff valve is not working, leading the pilot to assume pump failure. The pilot replaces the pump with a speedier model, which only exacerbates the debris problem. Alerted by a seriously stinky house, the technician makes repeated trips to the roof, equipped with a pointy object to clear the line. The technician is sorta clumsy, tripping over additional support gear (garden hose) and handling the heavy, smelly pads causes additional heart palpitations and irritation.

The technician realizes that the pilot, should have replaced/cleaned the old filter basket when he replaced the pump, since unfiltered gunk jams the new filter and pipes. Her quest for an appropriate filter part finally lands her in the labyrinth that is the garage of Mom and Dad.

Armed with the pointy object and fresh filter basket, the technician heads to the roof for the fifth time. The house is smelling foul again, will she succeed? Will the house ever feel as fresh and clean as it did last night?! Can the technician cope with the conflicting suggestions of her well-meaning mother and the perplexed pilot?…… *commercial break*

Nah. The Technician did the best she could with the clogged lines, clearing them repeatedly. She had a half a glass of wine and attended to the fussy passenger squalling for yogurt and peaches in fussy-business class.

The house still smells bad. The pilot will need to disassemble the water distribution pipes and listen to the technician complain. Perhaps the outcome can still be inspirational and the crew can celebrate with a nice dinner. Stay tuned….

E.T.A. After receiving the above message in an email, the pilot not only left work early, but he also bought a new AC motor (so we don’t have to hand-start the existing motor if the power fails like we did last week). The craft is working swell and the house smells like baking salmon and couscous…

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